Stressed. Is anyone else feeling this way? My stress is different this year than in years past. I’m not too stressed about shopping and cooking and the hustle and bustle of Christmas. Instead my stress is due to fear. I know I may sound crazy but I’m scared. The recent acts of terrorism and violence leave me feeling worried and scared for my family, friends and for our world.

I was walking Luke to school the other day and had a complete panic attack as he walked through the school doors. I believe his school is very safe, but my mind still worries and is full of what ifs? The sad and crazy thing is this doesn’t just happen when I drop Luke off at school. I find myself feeling anxious and constantly on the lookout when I walk into a store, the bank, the shopping mall, work, the doctors office and even church. What I have realized lately is that it’s ok to have a watchful eye and to be safe, but I need to find a way to not let it consume my day, to not let it make me so stressed. That day I left Luke at school my fear set in and I thought to myself I can’t live like this. I can’t go on day to day worrying something is going to happen to Luke, my family, my friends. It would be extremely rare that something would happen, right? And then I think of Gracie. How many people lose their almost 2 year old child to cancer? It’s rare, but it happened to me. And I know that rare things can happen and that nobody is immune to them, whether it be cancer or a terrorist attack. Gracie’s cancer was kind of like a terrorist in her little body. It didn’t act fast. It was slow, painful, and brought worry and sadness to her and my family. But there were also times that this “terrorist” couldn’t bring my family down. We couldn’t live in fear and sadness all the time and it was the people around us and the love they gave our family and we gave each other that helped us overcome the “hostage-like” situation cancer put us in.

It was then on my walk home that I said to myself- What can make me feel not so scared and anxious and stressed? What makes me happy? I went through a list of things- shopping- no, lots of money- no, a new car- no, nothing “material” was going to help. And then it hit me! I am most happy when others around me are happy. There is nothing better than seeing or knowing you put a smile on the face of the person or people you are with. Talking to people, spending time with people and helping people are the most rewarding things you can do. The smiles and memories that are made when you surround yourself with people who make you smile and people who respect your differences and opinions is something that no terrorist in any form can take away from us.
This holiday season I hope to be able to put a smile on the faces of my family, friends and even strangers I meet. I believe that grace, kindness, and love can help so many overcome feelings of stress, fear and sadness that unspeakable events leave us feeling. One of my favorite Christmas songs is Let There Be Peace on Earth. I tear up every time I hear it because it seems so easy to live in Peace, but it is so hard for so many to do. So this year my Christmas wish is for Peace…..

Let there be Peace in the hearts of those who have lost a loved one in a terrorist attack.
Let there be Peace in the hearts of all people, regardless of race, religion, color, gender or nationality and hope that we can all get along and respect each other’s differences.
Let there be peace in the hearts of those who have lost a loved one.
Let there be Peace in the hearts of those who are battling cancer.
Let there be Peace in the hearts of those who are battling life threatening diseases.
Let there be Peace in the hearts of those who have lost a child.
And Please, Please, Please…
Let there be Peace on Earth.